I'm really going crazy.

this world is crazy.

I'm so angry. not with anyone else but myself. why can't i stand up for myself? why can't i do so? i should fight for what i want and need. why couldn't i? why??

cause i'm scared once i open my mouth and spurt out what i wanna say i'll lose it. i'll totally lose it. shouldn't i be prepared for it? why am i feeling so unsettled, cheated and disappointed?